There’s not a pause button on life or is there? 

It happens to all of us…we want to hear that verse again from that song we’re listening to through our earbuds at the gym…or we use Tivo to catch up on our favorite shows…pausing TV right in the middle to run into the kitchen to get a snack or take a needed bathroom break. 


What about your life as you know it?

Where the hell is the pause button? Is it hidden underneath the cushions of the couch like loose change…is it packed away in the garage amongst the boxes of Christmas decorations?

Nope…not there either folks. 

It simply doesn’t exist, or maybe it does 

So in the interim, how do we prevent life from getting the best of us without losing our freaking minds? First thing…PRAY. Next comes all the rest that I’ll get to shortly. 

Parents especially understand this…you cannot pause your life away from your duties as a parent-well at least no good parent does. We all need breaks and in turn, are better parents for it. 
As a FTM, I cherish all the moments spent with my beautiful son…but I also relish in the time I’m able to get away for myself. It doesn’t happen always as planned, but never underestimate the power of a scented candle and a hot bath all ALONE. There is a God. 

Before women were mothers…guess what? Yeah…they were women too and hmmmm ya know what?? We STILL are. With that revelation comes a whole gamut of things that make us who we are. 

What helps keep clarity in our lives?

SUPPORT…did I put that in all CAPS, yes I did…and I will do it again. SUPPORT. 

Having a support system, whether that’s a spouse, a parent, a friend, etc…means everything. It also serves others to understand that JUST because you work outside of the house and you have a partner that does not, certainly DOES NOT negate you from your parental responsibilities. Parenting is a 24/7 365 day a year job…it’s sad when people can’t be on the same page with this. 

Wake up call…

If you choose to be a parent, you choose to go above and beyond what’s humanly possible on a daily, nightly, and everywhere in between basis. You’re always wearing your superhero badge. That’s how it is…mothers and fathers included.

So what’s the problem?

In some households there is no balance to parenting…thus, no pause button, no break button…better get like the energizer bunny and “make it do what it do.”

Then, there are some that have seen the light! They get it!! They have a system that works!! In these households, there is more peace than arguments…more talking than yelling…more love than animosity. There you have it, they’re winning! 

When you find your own personal “pause” button…you’ll know it. You need a break sometimes, and sometimes is OK. It makes a hell of a lot of difference when others understand how to help you get to a place where you can reset. 

Don’t neglect your peace…fight for that. 

Stay encouraged…

Desirae BBB

A Few Things Mothers Should Teach Their Sons

I was looking quite intently at my son yesterday, ((as I do most days)) and I thought to myself…There are so many things I need to teach you…so many things you need to learn. 

A few things came to mind that I admired in my own father…things that made him a good man, the very same things that would make ANY man a better person. 

I came up with this list for now:

1. How to cook AND clean for himself…be self sufficient in all things?????

2. How to treat, speak, and be respectful to a woman??

3. If you make a mistake then own it, apologize, make up for it & move forward ?

4. Cry if you need to?

3. Live intentionally (Life is too damn short to be unhappy…do those things that make YOU happy and bring YOU joy.)?

6 Cowards die many times before their deaths…stand up and fight for what you believe.⛪️

7. Remember your time is a precious gift⏱

8. Make sure your family feels connected…??????

9. True manhood is about putting others before yourself

10. Appreciate when someone does even the smallest thing for you (They didn’t have to) 

11. Use your words to elevate yourself and others. 
12. ALWAYS tell a woman she’s beautiful…especially your wife or mother ?